Keep smiling

Well Hey !

Eeeeeek ! I'm so excited to start blogging its unreal !

So here I am on my first post and I've been thinking about what to tell you guys and make this page look as interesting as possible and well...it's been hard. So I sat down and thought 'what the hell am I going to do? I'm not used to this !' and so I thought 'well what do I know?'

And then I decided that at the minute... I don't feel like I know anything.

For all of you who have just started college, I'm sure we are all in the same boat but I feel like I'm sat in lessons, trying my hardest and its not going in. Its like I left my brain back at High school and its failed to be returned to me through lost property... I don't think I would want it back if it had been there actually with all the lost trainers and dirty PE tops...EWW!

For my 4 options, I chose Psychology, Media, Product Design and Sociology (which was originally maths but I changed my mind). Now I got good GCSE results and so did all my friends and we were all so proud of them, some of us a bit impressed at how much we had managed to remember in the exams and went for a celebratory meal at the poshest restaurant around... Frankie and Bennies of course. We even had pudding! So unfortunately my one friend was going to another 6th form to me and my other two friends and we had all been really close since year 7, meaning this was one of the last things we would probably do together. Turns out we did meet up again after results day but we don't get to see each other every day which is sad. Anyway back to the point, we knew it was going to be hard and a big step but come on...its like I'm on a different planet.

Sometimes I think I've understood something in class and that little party in my head are singing CEEEEELERBRATE GOOD TIMES COME ON ! but then I get home, sit down to do it and I have the monkey with his cymbals ,marching around. I remember nothing ! A lot of my friends are having the same problem and the whole stress of it is definitely rubbing off on people. Another inspiration for this post is that one of my BESTEST friends in the whole entire world just phoned me and she's the one who started my crazy YouTube obsession. Literally if I had a problem or needed anything, literally anything, this girl would help. We have been extremely close for a while but in different friendship groups, which has its benefits, but we tell each other everything and today I had her ring me in tears, so my initial reaction to her crying down the phone to me was 'Ohh no what's the BF done now?'. But no, it was simply school. Like most of us its got to her and she needed a good cry to let it all out but being hormonal teenagers we do that quite a lot, so when she explained I said to her that I was feeling the same and so were a lot of other people, the first few weeks are going to be hard but we will get there in the end. After she had gone to do some work I continued with mine and yet again my mind began to wonder but not this time to the monkey, but to the future.

I want to do well. Everyone wants to do well and I can tell you now my worst fear is failure, hence why me and my friend get on so well...we are both utter stress heads. We made jokes before results that she was going to be her dream job, a Doctor and I would be an Engineer, making millions and eating in PROPER fancy restaurants...or KFC what ever we want. But at no stage in this dream was their any mention of us being happy, fulfilled or content. It sounds soooo cliché but you can have all the money in the world with your dream job, just how you had planned life out to be from a young age, but if you're not happy then what's the point? So then I thought about our new dream future. And I could sum it up in one word. Unpredictable.

We don't know what's going to happen, who we are going to meet and where we are going to end up but the one thing I'm noticing at the minute is that I'm not as happy as I used to be, whether that be my circumstances or just the people around me feeling stressed to. I hate seeing friends upset more than feeling upset myself and she made me realise today that as long as we try our hardest, which I can assure you we are, we can't do anymore than that. Everything happens for a reason and as long as we are happy then the world is our oyster.

So if you're reading this and you have been feeling a bit stressed or worried, just remember we are all in the same boat, hopefully not the titanic and as long as you have faith in yourself and keep smiling (my little motto) everything will fall into place how it was set out for you, whether its what you always envisaged yourself doing or something completely different, you will always find happiness where you take it.

Keep Smiling :)

Niamh